A particular gentleman, to honor his distant relative Leon Kuhajewski, the inventor of the world’s first astronomical watch in 1816, embarked on a quest to create the perfect vodka.
He met with master distillers from many lands: with a Pole – because Leon was Polish, with a Swiss – because that astronomical watch is kept in a famous Swiss museum, and with an Englishman – because our ingenious inventor was keen to visit England.
But working with the Englishman was a plodding affair. Each new vodka sample was scarcely halfway between the previous sample and the recipe of perfection sought by our aforementioned gentleman.
It is a curiosity that during this time our hero’s bedside novel was ‘The Life and Opinions of Tristram Shandy, Gentleman’, by Laurence Sterne. This is a tale in which nothing happens, and in the third volume the eponymous Mr. Shandy is still not born. To our gentleman’s chagrin the same fate befell the launch of his vodka – three years later the project was exactly where it had been on day one.
The story of Tristram Shandy begins with an unwound clock. It was his Papa’s habit to wind up his timepiece before fulfilling his conjugal duties, while his mother understood conjugal duties commenced, like clockwork, with the sound of clock winding. One fateful day his Papa forgot to wind his timepiece, and that very same night Tristram Shandy was conceived.
Due to this bizarre twist of fate, the drink is to be produced in England, and called ‘Broken Clock’. To make the protracted wait more rewarding, our esteemed gentleman has released this limited edition of ‘Coming Soon’ – exquisitely empty bottles filled with the anticipation of a Vodka worth waiting for.
It goes without saying that full bottles are coming soon. We are simply waiting for the apples to ripen in the garden of Shandy Hall.